Long story short I don’t feel like I deserve romance in my life yet. I feel like I got nothing to offer. I have felt this way for most of my life. Even though I have developed plenty of hobbies (I dance, skateboard, climb, go to the gym, etc.) and social circles. On one hand I am happy with myself and on another I feel like I can’t offer the other party anything, romance wise.

Normally others would say ‘You’ll find someone dont’cha worry ‘bout notin’ ya’hear?’ But I am at a point now where I hope a woman will not develop feelings for me because I am afraid of disappointing her. And through the years this only been getting worse. I know this is not a good way of thinking but I just can’t shake it.

I want to (mentally) change but I just don’t know how. So if anyone has got some tips for me (really anything goes) that might help I would very much appreciate it.

Note: I don’t care if the process of learning self love is slow, I just want to know what the process involves.

Edit: I am reading some great suggestions. So thank you all for that. Just as a reminder, I am not expecting people on the internet to fix my problems. Just some general, rule of thumb, tips (and or tricks).

  • MagicShel@lemmy.zipEnglish
    11·
    6 days ago

    People have inherent worth. What do you think t need to do, or be, or accomplish to be worthy of love? Because I will tell you almost none of it is necessary beyond being a good partner. My wife, in some ways is a better person than I could ever be — and in some ways not.

    If you communicate, compromise and are attentive, industrious, and honest I would hazard a guess that you will find someone eventually because just those qualities make someone a good partner — if you can do that, someone out there is looking for someone like you right now, because they’ve been burned by people without those traits.

    Then the real trick is to find someone who is worthy of you in return. They should be the kind of person who wants to be part of your dreams and goals, and you should want to be part of theirs. And they should have the qualities of a good partner as well.