I’m sure I have a bunch, but for the fediverse I think the most controversial is that I think neopronouns are a bad idea. DISCLAIMER I support queer folks, and I also use neopronouns when requested (because there’s zero reason to be a dick about it), but I think everybody would be better off without them.
The entire purpose of pronouns is to offer a quick, generic (i. e. non-individual) way of referring to people or objects without using their names. Using neopronouns which have to be communicated and learned first is the opposite of that. So in my view they’re not really pronouns, just additional names one has to learn for a person.
I think the most sensible way of accommodating all genders is using whatever pronouns are present in the language (usually male and female, or a generic pronoun), plus a non-binary pronoun if needed, like singular they in English.
Wholeheartedly agree. Especially when I come across things like bios or work emails where known-cis people have pronouns listed as “she/they” and “he/they”. It feels like a mockery, almost like HR’s advertizing they’re “diverse” while simultaneously ignoring every complaint of discrimination that couples across their dashboard. Pronouns are not a one-size-fits-all aesthetic to be appropriated and customized like a game avatar. They mean things, which is why people care about them in the first place.
I don’t know your specific coworkers, so this is my experience:
He/they can be a reasonable placeholder for not wanting to confuse non-queer folks with any/all which doesn’t have a great shorthand. He/they gets close enough, especially for something that I don’t have strong feelings about.
There’s also maybe an argument for putting they if you’re ok with it. I had a trans coworker who very much was not ok with people calling her they.
This has also been a really controversial take of mine. But I have an even more controversial opinion that if I’m not well aquanted or friends with you, using they/them to refer to you is not offensive. I can barely remember peoples names much less your specific pronouns
At least in my experiance I’ve been dragged because “X told you their pronouns, using they means your trying to invalidate them” I’ve talked to X like 3 times and do not plan on being more then acquaintances/coworkers. Somedays I just want to say, “I wont remeber your pronouns because I don’t care about you, not because I’m transphobic” but that would just create a lot of drama I would care even less about
100% agree with this. I feel like neo pronouns make communication way more complicated. I don’t care what people identify as. It’s easier to just only use a person’s name and nothing else if we are going beyond he/she/they.
the sudden PC of pronouns is a response to rise in transphobia, older than gen z almost neve ruse it. and i cringe everytime someone tries to make generic descriptions of someone, being intentionally vague to offend people is pretty bad too. people are trying to hard , and they are offended in advanced.
I’m sure I have a bunch, but for the fediverse I think the most controversial is that I think neopronouns are a bad idea. DISCLAIMER I support queer folks, and I also use neopronouns when requested (because there’s zero reason to be a dick about it), but I think everybody would be better off without them.
The entire purpose of pronouns is to offer a quick, generic (i. e. non-individual) way of referring to people or objects without using their names. Using neopronouns which have to be communicated and learned first is the opposite of that. So in my view they’re not really pronouns, just additional names one has to learn for a person.
I think the most sensible way of accommodating all genders is using whatever pronouns are present in the language (usually male and female, or a generic pronoun), plus a non-binary pronoun if needed, like singular they in English.
Wholeheartedly agree. Especially when I come across things like bios or work emails where known-cis people have pronouns listed as “she/they” and “he/they”. It feels like a mockery, almost like HR’s advertizing they’re “diverse” while simultaneously ignoring every complaint of discrimination that couples across their dashboard. Pronouns are not a one-size-fits-all aesthetic to be appropriated and customized like a game avatar. They mean things, which is why people care about them in the first place.
I don’t know your specific coworkers, so this is my experience:
He/they can be a reasonable placeholder for not wanting to confuse non-queer folks with any/all which doesn’t have a great shorthand. He/they gets close enough, especially for something that I don’t have strong feelings about.
There’s also maybe an argument for putting they if you’re ok with it. I had a trans coworker who very much was not ok with people calling her they.
This has also been a really controversial take of mine. But I have an even more controversial opinion that if I’m not well aquanted or friends with you, using they/them to refer to you is not offensive. I can barely remember peoples names much less your specific pronouns
I think this is a less controversial take tbh
At least in my experiance I’ve been dragged because “X told you their pronouns, using they means your trying to invalidate them” I’ve talked to X like 3 times and do not plan on being more then acquaintances/coworkers. Somedays I just want to say, “I wont remeber your pronouns because I don’t care about you, not because I’m transphobic” but that would just create a lot of drama I would care even less about
100% agree with this. I feel like neo pronouns make communication way more complicated. I don’t care what people identify as. It’s easier to just only use a person’s name and nothing else if we are going beyond he/she/they.
the sudden PC of pronouns is a response to rise in transphobia, older than gen z almost neve ruse it. and i cringe everytime someone tries to make generic descriptions of someone, being intentionally vague to offend people is pretty bad too. people are trying to hard , and they are offended in advanced.